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“Original Marketing,” the Part 2 – Thus actually to Care Of People
It became extended in the business literature to tell that businessmen who care of others, tend to be a success more. Thus, business authors speak, it will get profit you to operate as the careful person. Tell “thanks,” a smile, study the left eye of people, allow them to do the conversation most part, and so on.
I think that is true that people who are sincerely interested for well-being of others, do the best businessmen. But it does not mean that we can develop real anxiety on others simply, imitating careful people – imitating their language of a body and a word which they use.
We can to see easily it, I think, when we recollect the moments when someone has highlighted a counterfeit smile in us. Corners of their mouth have risen, but their eyes were firm, and were afraid or were angry. It has made all was, create awkwardness for us – it certainly did not force us to wish to have business relations with them.
I will bet that you can remember also time when you have entered into an informal meeting with prejudiced concepts how you should operate – probably you thought that you should look charming, aloof, successful, or something else. It was pleasant or unfortunate? I think that the answer is clear – undertaking everything that the effort to look a certain way is not any entertainment in general.
Wonder, Why you Do not care
If care of others not about imitation kind people how we do it? In my experience the first step should study attentively that proceeds in the moments when we do not care of people – when our hearts are closed.
My sense consists that when we do not feel interested in well-being of others, it – because we are occupied by protection. Meaningly or not, we think that there is a threat to our survival. Naturally, we are concentrated to leaving from, that threat, and other steels only by means for that end. We start to ignore people who are not similar that they can give us money or prestige, and operating those who does.
So, I think, what it is useful to ask us, every time when our hearts are closed, “what threat with which I try to deal right now? I protect me from what danger?” The answer which you reach if you sincerely ask this question, could be something as it:
“I should look rigid to make sure that people do not cause me a pain.”
“I should look made success, or nobody will work with me.”
“I should be noticed speaking with correct people, or my social status will be destroyed.”
“I should receive clients in this case, or my business is shot.”
Collision Before Danger
It has fine sense that when we think, this way, caring of others is impossible. But I think that you will notice that the question which I have described, helps to place the apprehended threat in prospect. The more close you look at imagined danger, the less serious it starts to seem.
Really truly, for example, that your business will collapse, if you do not receive clients in this case? And even if your business really would collapse, what it really would mean for you? You would break up and would never be noticed again? Or it is more probable, what you would rise and would try something else? Notice, as soon as research of fear is a little with questions as they can make, that this beginning to thaw.
My sense consists that people naturally sostradatel’ny to each other. Enjoying that compassion, I think, more question of to release ways with which we protect us against to be damaged than storing correct “helps and dodges.”